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Showing posts from November, 2008

Dave Barry's Annual Gift Guide - 2008 Edition Now Available

It was way back in 2005 that I first noted Dave Barry's Annual Gift Guide with the stand out items of the year for being the fine KISS Celebriduck , Funky Musical Toilet and the Scrolling LED Belt Buckle From Dave's full 2008 list you will notice that I have chosen a few select items you may have Father Christmas place beneath the tree for me: Talking Fly Swatter Gun-Shaped Egg Fryer Zombie Yard Sculpture 'Firm Grip' Brand Butt Glue Restroom Baby-hanger Hug Me Pillow Wearable Sleeping Bag The Uroclub Gassy Gus Flatulence Game

Stop Racism In New Zealand

Stop Racism - it's not much to ask ... is it? Especially when you read Protecting My Child’s Innocence by mrsgooding This is the moment when I thought, "Fuck 'em, racist bastards - STOP IT!!!" But sometimes, there are things that you can’t ignore. Especially if they are emotionally affecting someone you love more than life itself. That someone is my only daughter, Bea. Yesterday, she came home from school hysterical after a very traumatic bus ride. Five teenage boys taunted her and THREW STONES at her INSIDE the school bus while taunting her saying she doesn’t belong here and that she’s an Asian b*tch . If she was not in a public place, who knows what extent they’d go to in their desire to be hurtful and destructive. I shudder at the thought. It took all my herculean effort not to break down while my daughter narrated what happened to her over the phone. I rage at the thought that this happened while my daughter was on her own without her family to protect h

He Finally Did It!

(thanks Adam's Jokelist)

Something For The Little Lady In Your Life

I am so convinced that these adverts will make 'er indoors' life a little bit easier that if you don't receive a warm, loving hug straight from your better half I will personally pop round and let her know she's wrong and tell her to buck her ideas up* Here are 3 of my personal favourites, from 9 of the most disturbingly misogynistic old print ads from a time back when men were men, women were women and advertisers had no friggin' idea that this would come back and bite them on the bum. Of course the challenge is to take the ads being pumped out now and work out what will receive a similar posting in 30 years!! But the real reason I got you here, is to ask you to read this from Che Finn Higgins - Failed by police, Wellington mental workers On with the pay off ... * some conditions apply ... like I won't be doing anything of the sort!

[Yaaaaawn, streeeetch] Huh, oh, [mumble] morning

It was a big night out last night. Some highs and some lows (pork bellys). Some goods (Epic Pale Ale) and some bads. Funniest thing though was Liz bumping into her first love at Mighty Mighty - Shane. You know it's always funny doing that, noticing an old flame in a darkened crowded room ... and after so many years and with ya husband in tow it's even funnier. They had a good old natter, he seems to be a bit of a Lothario living the life of a single man, top work fella but I'm sure it's not all beer and skittles. Old flames eh, what's that all about? I'm quite lucky in that I am, for the most part, still in touch with a lot of my ex's. Some just as a "Facebook friend", some more so because they're here in Wellington. Not all of course, some would rather cross the road rather than piss on me if I was on fire. But you get that sometimes - same goes the other way from me for one or two. But generally, the nice ones (and that's why I went o

Vodafone: Update Account Details ... FAIL!

*sheesh*, there's seems to be an ongoing issue of usability over at Vodafone So, I struggle through to the online system after getting my password re-set. I then see that the details are of my mate who used to have the number, that'll be why I didn't know the password :-) I find the link to where I think I can update the name ... but no, it's everything else. Ach, I'm up for that and fill in the boxes and hit enter ... error in my input! Ok, must've missed that, my mistake ... let me just enter the "Title" for you and we'll be away ... OH! No actual field to enter into ...

Official Monty Python YouTube Channel - Yaaaay

Brilliant response from the Monty Python team around illegal Python vids being placed up on YouTube: We know who you are, we know where you live and we could come after you in ways too horrible to tell. But being the extraordinarily nice chaps we are, we've figured a better way to get our own back: We've launched our own Monty Python channel on YouTube .

The Secret Of Making Yorkshire Pudding

A handsome wee email from my Dad, nice - Oh, that's not a picture of my Dad but it's certainly reminiscent of home in Monmouth of a cold Sunday lunchtime Yorkshire Pudding Eh waiter, excuse me a minute I'm not findin' fault, but dear me 'taties is lovely and beef is alreit But what sort of pudding can this be? It's what? Yorkshire Puddin'? Now cum cum cum cum It's Yorkshire Puddin' yer say? I'll grant yer it's some sort o' puddin', owd lad But not THE Yorkshire Puddin', nay, nay. Now reit Yorkshire Puddin's a poem in batter, T'mek it's an art, not a trade So just listen t' me and I'll tell t' thee How t' first Yorkshire puddin' were made A young angel wi day off from 'eaven, Were flyin' abaht Ilkla Moor, When t' angel, poor thing, got cramp in a wing An' cum down at an owd women's door T' owd woman said "Eee - it's an angel. By 'eck, I'm f

Quite possibly my favourite picture of Meg, ever

Meg, dancing at Hi-5 - Originally uploaded by Mike Riversdale Meg, dancing at Hi-5

Kids TV Is Not Just For Kids, Otherwise I'd Not Have Taken So Many Photos Of Hi-5 Kellie, Shurely

Strangely enough, once I uploaded the "on stage" photos of the fairly recent Hi-5 show here in Wellington I noticed that there were one or two or many photos of just one of the Hi-5 gang, Kellie who is the blonde, very fit (physically and ... other) and gregarious girl of the gang and for some reason I obviously had to have an in focus shot of her - not sure I managed it. Hi-5 have, like the Wiggles , been through a stage of growth recently losing some of their key staff - can anyone truly replace Greg, noooooooooooooooo! And it showed, the two Hi-5 members that had the most stage presence (I know we're talking about a "kid's show" but believe me you can see the good from the bad), the seniority and the on stage fun were Nathan and, of course, Kellie . Fit these captions to the relevant photos: We hear you Nathan, we hear you Hi-5 swingers Nathan is intrigued, could she really promise all that? "Feel THAT!" Blurred but still fit "What t

One Day I WILL Go - Pecha Kucha Night Wellington #04 -

I love everything about these nights and I know I'll love them even more if actualy got along to one! Pecha Kucha Night Wellington #04 PKN_WGN_04 // 25 november 2008 // Paramount Cinema, 25 Courtenay Place, Wellington City // doors open 7.30pm / start 8.20pm // $9 on the door (cash only) Come and join us for our last Pecha Kucha Night in Wellington for the year 2008. Pecha Kucha - which originated in Tokyo - is a unique, rapid-fire format in which each speaker shows 20 images, each for 20 seconds. With each presentation lasting just 6 minutes and 40 seconds, the audience experiences an exhilarating variety of ideas and projects. We put together a great line-up of speakers for you to enjoy: Craig Stevens // Scientist // Environmental turbulence - or how to capture ephemera for a living Suzanne Tamaki // Fashion designer // about natives in fabulous frocks Heather Galbraith // Curat

Famous Diaries As Blogs

Here's an old 'draft' post I found at the bottom of the sock drawer ... but now that the initial spotlight has moved on it's good to be reminded ;-) The diary I'd love to see posted is I Will Bear Witness by Victor Klemperer . The best description I have is that it is "a Technicolor version of life as a German Jew during World War II". I have to read it in stages as it makes me so angry, incredulous and sad. If it can be put up as on-line diary (copyright and all that) I think it would educate a whole generation of those that now think, "It was such a long time ago and not really anything to do with me". Pepys Diary: http://www.pepysdiary.com I read almost all of the diaries whilst I was living in Clapham around 1993/4 which just seemed so appropriate as it hadn't really changed (a few more police cars I s'pose) since Mr Pepys retired there. George Orwell's Diary: http://orwelldiaries.wordpress.com Each day that goes by seems

NZ Election - I Only Care About One Promise National Has Made To Us

As a lot of you will already know I don't really hold a lot of truck with politicians and politics (in the generalist sense) as they both have VERY little to do with my life. In fact the ever approaching financial doom that we are all imminently about to experience may have more of an effect on me and mine and this has nothing to do with NZ politicians (or even US/UK politicians if you remove their obvious financial interests). And so when asked who would I vote for this weekend I would randomly mention any party that popped into my head ... well, any except ACT as they do seem to be a little bit nasty. Oh, and the Kiwi Party because they're obviously just mad. I would then follow up my answer with, "It doesn't really matter does it? It'll probably be a slight shift to the right (we're talking millimetres not kilometres) because both main parties are 'purple' and long gone are the days of 'red' and 'blue" In the US this is probably an

iPhone And Your Website

I noticed a while ago that Ben's Diversity website worked gloriously with my iPhone - especially pleasing was an article page that removed the sidebar. And so I have copied that idea and removed everything from an article page except the article and comments. Of course not everyone has an iPhone or any other type of mini-screen PDA and the vast majority of the readers will be coming here via either RSS ( subscribe ) or on a normal sized PC (whatever "normal sized" is in the world of multi monitors). If I have broken anything for you folks then let me know If you're a web designer and want to start thinking about optimising your pages for an iPhone then check out Put Your Content in My Pocket by Craig Hockenberry Wow, this was my oldest "in draft" post from waaaaay back in September 2007 - who says technology moves at light speed!?

Stephen Fry's Writes Language

Enjoy Don’t Mind Your Language… , I know I did as I sat here slowly recovering from ickiness of a viral/germ/bleurgh couple of days: ... and here we are. Glass and concrete sentences right next to half-timbered Elizabethan phrases, a Starbucks of an utterance dwelling in an expression that once belonged to a Victorian banker, an Apple Store of an accent in a converted Georgian merchant’s lingo. You get the point. And I am particularly pleased to see that Mr Fry isn't overly fond of the small pedants amongst us that are constantly implying superiority because they know where the apostrophe should/should not go: They whip out their Sharpies and take away and add apostrophes from public signs, shake their heads at prepositions which end sentences and mutter at split infinitives and misspellings, but do they bubble and froth and slobber and cream with joy at language? Do they ever let the tripping of the tips of their tongues against the tops of their teeth transport them to giddy eu

Windows 3.x Is No More, *sigh*

I remember the moment I saw Microsoft Windows 3.1 back in the early 1990's and was blown away. But now it is no more :-( Interesting potted history from Computerworld , did you know that it "it lived on as an embedded operating system": ... it was used in devices such as cash tills and ticketing systems. It is also used as the embedded operating system that powers the in-flight entertainment systems on some Virgin and Qantas long-haul jets. For those that care, Windows XP support runs out in April 2009

Aha, A Novel And Unusual Use Of The Word "Every"

This from an Air NZ email that flopped into my InBox just now: ... every Air New Zealand Flight* can earn you Status Points ... Sounds good, no? But what about that little asterisk, how does Air NZ mean by "every": *Flights paid for with Airpoints Dollars and travel industry tickets, prize competition tickets, free tickets and tickets purchased using Fly Buys points cannot earn Status Points. Oh. So a lot of tickets, in fact probably most tickets, punters would buy are covered by this "exciting new scheme" ... but not "every". Why didn't they just say "most" or "nearly all" or even "everyday". My point? Sticking a bloody asterisk on a word does not mean you can lie* * Posts with a humour element and those written by a human cannot be held to be truthful

NZ Election Night, The Boredom Has Been Relieved By Bill And Ben

I know that, as I write, there's probably some incredibly historic moment going on in the USofA and all power to them for doing whatever it is that they've done. But hey, here in New Kiwi Zealand we also have high politics being played out. Trouble is it really is just "playing" and so we've all sort of stumbled towards Saturday with an inevitability of, "This doesn't really matter" and, "God! Aren't Election Nights Really Bloody Boring In MMP" ... sorry, not sure why the capitals for that line but read into it what you need. But have no fear because the official Bill And Ben Party (from Pulp Sport - and YES, you really can vote for them) has come to save our Saturday night from turgidity and pomposity and even from yawnsville. This wee drinking game - oh, did I say being saved in my world normally involves alcohol and games, sorry if I've got you so far and you're not a drinker ... then again, what the hell are you reading t

This SUNDAY - 2008 Worser Bay School Fair

11am - Fair Opens - All Day Action 12pm - Rapid Raffles, Live Entertainment & a Silent Auction ( details here (pdf) ) 1pm - Treasure Island Parade - wear your best peg leg .... and back this year a Craft Stall for treasures & gifts ... Also - have you photo taken with Wellington's treasure, the RANFURLY SHIELD! EFTPOS will be available (no credit cards) View Larger Map

Humour From The Wire, Item #182 (Letter Of The Year)

This from an Aussie mate of mine - click on each picture for bigginess! First the speeding fine : The brilliant response (2 pages) : - The police response, fine waived

Humour From The Wire, Item #167 (Facebook Fvckup)

The first humour item of the day also includes a message for us all. I know that there are some in Wellington that have lost out on jobs because of such craziness ... be aware people: Why your boss should never be your Facebook Friend How one Sydney worker's claim of illness was undone by his Facebook update There are many good reasons for not having your boss as a Facebook friend, and Sydney call centre worker Kyle Doyle has just discovered the most convincing of them all. An email exchange between the 21-year-old and his boss has become a viral sensation in the past couple of days, readers wincing in sympathy as Doyle's insistence he missed a day of work through genuine illness is demolished when the manager points out an incriminating Facebook entry. The brief status update, dated for the day he called in ill, is simple and to the point: Kyle Doyle is not going to work, fuck it I'm still trashed. SICKIE WOO! The emails begin with a manager at Doyle&