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Showing posts from September, 2020
Blue, But I Like Green
If I've told this story before I apologise and beg you allow me to repeat myself. Green is my favourite colour. Everyone has a favourite colour when pressed by insistent 8 year olds. I was lying on my Chiswick hammock in the early months of the sparkling new millennium. Life was most excellent indeed, I was employed by an international software company that I enjoyed massively. I was paid a LOT. I had friends that enjoyed the same things that I did. I had proved that flying to Wellington for a weekend visit was eminently do-able. I did however need a visa or permanent residency to carry on this lifestyle but no fear, the company had told me they wanted me to stay and they would sponsor me to gain such documentation. Lying there in my hammock I was deciding what to do. Sort of. I was lying in my hammock feeling the warm wind blow across my Saturday face, absorbing the late summer boat fun around me, and listening to music. It was Slice Of Heaven by Dave Dobbin. A more apt song for
Writing Done Good
I've just re-watched Death At A Funeral (2007 ) and it's still a fantastic farce. The end speech contains some thought provoking words as well: ... Life isn't simple, it's complicated. We're all just thrown in here together, in a world full of chaos and confusion, a world full of questions and no answers, death always lingering around the corner, and we do our best. We can only do our best, and my dad did his best. He always tried to tell me that you have to go for what you want in life because you never know how long you're going to be here. And whether you succeed or you fail, the most important thing is to have tried. And apparently no one will guide you in the right direction, in the end you have to learn for yourself. You have to grow up yourself.
Fathers Feelings
Being a father is tough. In a changing and challenging world the ways to be are no longer set in stone, accepted, and understood by all. Fathers now have the freedom to express their feelings, to acknowledge their failings, to know they need to sometimes stand up and other times to sit and listen. I believe my own father, Derek, Dad, took the first faltering family steps along this changing path. I don't think he liked it, in fact I know at times he absolutely loathed it and hankered for the clear road he had seen his own father travelling upon. A road full of power, ego, violence, and rage. A road however lined with love and hidden moments of care and tenderness. A straight and narrow road with clear sign posts, an understood destination, and clearly marked milestones on the way. It was at the age of 17 that I first realised the "Dad" was more than an honorific. It was a mindset, a way of being, and most importantly it was something you could see in the behaviour of men.