Thirteen ways to raise a nonreader

Very cool - and apt considering my recent rant-ette.

1: Never read where your children can see you

2: Put a TV or computer in every room. Don't neglect the bedrooms and kitchen

3: Correct your child every time she mispronounces a word.

4: Schedule activities every day after school so your child will never be bored.

5: Once your children can read independently throw out the picture books. They're for babies.

6: Don't play board games together. Too dull.

7: Give little rewards for reading. Stickers and plastic toys are nice. Money is even better.

8: Don't expect your children to enjoy reading. Kid's books are for teaching vocabulary, proper study habits and good morals.

9: Buy only 40-watt bulbs for your lamps.

10: Under no circumstances read your child the same book over and over. She heard it once, she should remember it.

11: Never allow your child to listen to books on tape; that's cheating.

12: Make sure your kids only read books that are "challenging". Easy books are a complete waste of time. That goes double for comic books and Mad magazine.

13: Absolutely, positively no reading in bed.

Text © 2001 by Dean Schnider and Robin Smith from a leaflet at The Children's Bookshop, Kilbirnie.
Reprinted from March/April 2001 issue of The Horn Book Magazine. For ordering information about the Horn Book Magazine and the Horn Book Guide, visit or call +1 (0)800-325 1170


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