On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me ...

By / 
December 14th: 1st Day

Dearest John:

I went to the door today and the postman delivered a partridge in a pear
tree. What a delightful gift. I couldn't have been more surprised.

With dearest love and affection, Agnes

--------------------------------------

December 15th: 2nd Day

Dearest John:

Today the postman brought your very sweet gift. Just imagine, two turtle
doves.... I'm just delighted at your very thoughtful gift. They are just
adorable.

All my love, Agnes

--------------------------------------

December 16th: 3rd Day

Dear John:

Oh, aren't you the extravagant one! Now I must protest. I don't deserve such
generosity. Three french hens. They are just darling but I must insist....
you're just too kind.

Love Agnes

--------------------------------------

December 17th: 4th Day

Today the postman delivered four calling birds. Now really! They are
beautiful, but don't you think enough is enough? You're being too romantic.

Affectionately, Agnes

--------------------------------------

December 18th: 5th Day

Dearest John:

What a surprise!  Today the postman delivered five golden rings. One for
each finger.  You're just impossible, but I love it.  Frankly, John, all
those squawking birds were beginning to get on my nerves.

All my love, Agnes

--------------------------------------

December 19th: 6th Day

Dear John:

When I opened the door there were actually six geese-a-laying on my front
steps. So you're back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are huge. Where
will I ever keep them? The neighbors are complaining and I can't sleep
through the racket. PLEASE STOP!

Cordially, Agnes

--------------------------------------
On the 7th day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Real song lyrics

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular articles

The Difference Between One Million And One Billion

Image
It feels like a billion is just a bit bigger than a million. Obviously it's bigger but it fits on the same scale as a million, surely. It doesn't. A billion is so so so much bigger than a million. I've trawled the internet finding graphics and videos that show the VAST difference between one million and one billion. Oh, and just to finish with a different misconception about space starting with the classic opening line from the great Douglas Adams and The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy : “Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.”

Do The Shake 'n' Vac And Put The Freshness Back

Image
How advertising jingles influence our buying choices (and why we can still sing them decades later) Recent market research found that several of the ten most recognisable jingles for UK adults dated back three or even four decades. While comparison site Go Compare topped the list, Mars’ “work, rest and play” jingle (axed in the mid-1990s) and even Shake ‘n’ Vac “put the freshness back” (1980) are still buzzing about in the heads of those polled. ... Research has shown that the period when we are around ten to 25 years old tends to be remembered most vividly. Music cues are also best at tapping into memories of this period, which is known as the “reminiscence bump”.

Regulatory Standards Bill: Submission

Image
You've done your Treaty Principles Bill submission , and that was a piece of cake eh. If that's what all Bill submissions are like then bring it on, the voice of the masses can be finally heard. Hmmmm, seems it's different for each Bill, which sort of makes sense. The Treaty Principles Bill is something that's not going anywhere no matter what happens, so it's been made very much a, "Tell us what you think and what could be done", expecting a tsunami of, "It's crap, throw it away". The response is gonna be, "Ok, we asked and we're gonna throw it away, as we were gonna anyway." There are Bills that have some substance to them, and the relevant Select Committee really do want to know what "we" think. In particular they want to know what the view of experts on that Bill's subject. This is the majority of normal Select Committee work, and tbh most of us just let that chug along coz, well, they know best and it's fo...

One Hundred Proofs That The Earth Is Not A Globe

Image
The best thing about  bonkers "science" books like this is that they're so old it's free to download and actually read them. So I did. INDEX. 1 The aeronaut sees for himself.   2 Standing water level.   3 Surveyors’ “allowance.”   4 Flow of Rivers—the Nile .  5 Lighthouses—Cape Hatteras.   6 The sea-shore.—“Coming up.”   7 A trip down Chesapeake Bay .  8 The model globe useless.   9 The sailor’s level charts.   10 The mariners’ compass.   11 The southern circumference.   12 Circumnavigation of the Earth.   13 Meridians are straight lines.   14  Parallels of latitude—circles.   15 Sailing down and underneath.   16 Distance round the South.   17 Levelness required by man.   18 The “level” of the astronomers.   19 Half the globe is cut off, now!   20 No “up” or “down” in nature?   21 The “spherical lodestone.”   22 No falsehoods wanted!   23 No proo...

2025, The Theme Is "Backfill"

Image
It's quite the moment when you're pondering, cogitating, think think thinking about something and then, *pop*, the answer comes into your mind. 2024 was a "Foundational" year for me. One of working out what I want to do with the final third of my time on this planet. And that has worked out well, I have moved on from tech and finding my feet in sustainable "community work". I want 2025 to be less, dramatic. I've been reflecting for the past few days what it should feel like and it slooooowly dawned upon me, I want this year to be a bedding in year. A quick Google of the stages one goes through when moving a tree from one spot to another and the word "backfill" is used a lot. Once you've uprooted the tree, put it into its new hole home then you need to backfill with soil and compost, pat it down, give it water, and settle it into its new place. That's me. Over 2023/4 I have uprooted the tree of my life and I'm now safely / happily in...

"Right Wing" Comedians

Image
Too many people comfortably plump themselves into an army of one type or another . Surrounded by those that sound like you, listen to you intently whilst nodding, and echo your thoughts on why the fight is a good fight and that the other side are such bad terrible people. I used to be more like that than I am nowadays ... hmmmm, aren't we humans meant to become more conservative and reactionary as we age, strange Mike. These thoughts have me thinking of two UK comedians that have been tagged as "right wing", which is putting them into an army for the benefit of someone but, I suspect, not them. First up,  Simon Evans who makes me laugh when he's talking about his family, kids, and life in Brighton. He then hit my ears big time with: Simon Evans Goes to Market , has had six seasons, delighting audiences with his witty and insightful take on the comedically unpromising territory of economics, all of which prove among the most popular downloads on the Sounds App. On the...

W. C. Fields quotes

Image
The office has all been moved around - new desks (with starter handles to raise and lower them), new high(er) speed network and ... the same old work. At least I have a differing view of the world, my team (well, the team I'm a part of not "my" team) is a lot closer - finally - and it's like an office from the 80's ... or even a classroom. But I still have time to move the crap off the PC : ------ Any man who hates dogs and loves whiskey can't be all bad. Anyone who hates Dogs and Kids Can't be All Bad. Hey! Who took the cork off my lunch??! Who stole the cork from my breakfast? Now don't say you can't swear off drinking, it's easy. I've done it a thousand times. Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. If at first you don't succeed, try, try, again. Then quit, no use being a damn fool about things. Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they alwa...

The Cookie Time DC-3, I Found It

Image
Every Kiwi that has ever been on a roadtrip up / down State Highway 1 knows about the Mangaweka Cookie Time Douglas DC-3 café. You may stopped off and had a look around inside, the kids and I certainly have. But in 2021 it was suddenly gone, what happened? Well, it seems the plane was owned by two Mangawekan (?) business people who had a falling out. One dark and stormy night one decided to ship it away without the knowledge of the other (sort of). Shifting the plane meant they had to take the wings off first and now the body lives in Shannon at 2 Ballance Street, just next to the Club Hotel / bar.  Apparently it's being restored and will go back .. it won't. The wings, well who knows where they disappeared to but I understand they're not gonna be joining the body anytime soon. A little history lesson for us all: ZK-APK was delivered to the RNZAF in August 1945, then sold to the newly-formed National Airways Corporation (NAC) in 1947 and given the name Poaka. NAC was New Ze...

Regulatory Standards Bill: Irony

Image
Oh, this is astounding how Seymour wants to have smaller government and yet has created a whole new department and is wrapping so much shite around a system that works just fine. It's all libertarian bollocks eh, just like they always publicly shout that the government should stay out of everyone's lives, especially in "the market", but siphon off as much of the public purse as they can and go running back to their Nanny State when it all gets a bit too hard.

The Hīkoi Has You Charged Up But The Work Starts Now

Image
The submission form: https://www.parliament.nz/en/ECommitteeSubmission/54SCJUST_SCF_227E6D0B-E632-42EB-CFFE-08DCFEB826C6/CreateSubmission The hīkoi mō te Tiriti  was the calling card, a start, a bringing people together from across the nation so that the work can now begin. Why? The Act party is already rallying it's members around the messages it wants to flood the select committee with. It is here they think they can insert their divisive messages. Act, David Seymour, and his backers (notably Atlas, but also other foreign neoliberal billionaires) are willing to play the long game, this is merely the start for them. Having said that, I suspect they've probably taken a small step back due to the sheer amount of people saying, "No, we do not accept this" culminating in today's 45,000+ show of will, but that won't mean anything in the coming weeks. Tomorrow the hard work starts. Let's not get too work-y though, first up something simple, add you voice to the...