Letting It All Flow

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My friends were once the lucky recipients of the following series of messages, ha ha ha.
So, I walked Tressilick Park along Kaiwharawhara stream, very nice ondeed

About 80% way on I'm thinking I could do with a poo

I get to the end and we're now on trouble

The map says there is a public toilet just at the end of a street as you come out of the park

I walk, it's going up, I'm clenching, CLENCHING

I get out, turn the wrong way and then I'm in a cul-de-sac

Oops

And that's when I let lose
Luckily there was no-one around and it was surrounded by trees
I disrobed, threw the undies away (too far gone), used as much grass and leaves as I could to clean myself up

Got an Uber, got home

In the shower I nearly fainted, I think I had heatstroke or something, which is weird
I'm upstairs now, sitting
Wowsers, what an afternoon
Better work stories

I know

I shit myself on the streets of Wadestown, who else can say that!?
Trelissick Park Trelissick Crescent, Ngaio, Wellington 6035, New Zealand

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