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Some Days

Some days the weather reflects the mood, but the greyness will drift away and the green trees and blue skies will visible.But not right now.

It Was Back In 2001 That I Applied To Be Manager Of A "Sex Shop"

I had returned from my two year "single man adventures" in Sydney* with a pot of gold under my arm and no great desire to work for the man. I joined any number of societies, clubs and communities. I had dinners, lunches and even the odd breakfast with friends. I even managed to desist from trying to shag the whole of Wellington after it was pointed out to me that I was off on that particular circle of life once again.

The life of leisure. A man with more money that time ...
God I got bored pretty bloody quickly.

And so I started looking around for something to do.
I most certainly did not want to go back to working in IT every again ... hmm. In fact I wanted to do something more people focussed. Now I can't remember the exact order of things but there was the Counselling Degree at WelTec and ... well, something very different.

I spotted in the local paper (ah, the days of physical newspapers :-) that d.vice ("Quality Adult Toys for Adventerous Everyday People") were expanding from the one shop to another (or moving to bigger premises ... or something). Anywho they wanted a Manager for their shop.

I like adventure, pretty keen on sex and love making people smile.
So, I found a PC somewhere and set about trying to make my very IT-centric CV as relevant as I could which, as you can imagine, was a labour of creativity and a lot of fun.

Popped the application form and CV into the post and then set off for another lunch meeting with the local art society (or some such activity I was prone to get up to a lot back then).

The post came, my CV was returned to me and I was regretfully not suitable for the position. Ah well, no big surprises there and nothing ventured nothing gained. I was disappointed but by no means down-and-out, I mean who knows where my life may have gone if they had said, "Yip, you're the man for us" - interesting to speculate eh. Ok, I confess, I did think for a few seconds it was because I was a man of the male species but I may have been looking for any excuse to make it general and not about me, hey we all do it :-)

Hang on though, what's that yellow sticky poking out of the CV ... oh lordy lord, they had inadvertently left their notes on the CV as they, I assume, passed it around the three owners of the company. And the one that will always stick in my mind was:
Totally qualified but I would be worried he would steal our ideas

Wow, really ... that was a thought that had never crossed my mind.

Firstly I recall thinking (and still do), "If you think that then surely you'd want to at least meet me!", I mean the people that may go into competition with you (and boy-oh-boy was that never gonna happen) are exactly the sort of people you should be hiring.

My second thought was, "How bloody rude!" ... they'd never met me and I was tarred with the brush 'industrial espionage'. Hurumph.

I never really lost a lot of sleep about it and to be honest, apart from having a giggle with my mates at the time (yip, I showed them) it's never even popped into my mind.

Until this floated across my Twitter stream from @dviceNZ

Are you a sales super star and experienced retail manager? Lead the D.VICE Welly team…find out more. http://www.dvice.co.nz/vacancies/12

HA HA HA HA - I RT'ed it with "I once applied for this, blog post to explain hilarity coming" and @dviceNZ asked what the "hilarity" was to which I said give me an email address and I'll send you this post. They did, and I did ... [silence] ... :-)

BTW: Their Wellington position is still open, applications must be in by 14th September - have at it!


* Yes, I know, it's time to put fingers on keyboards and add to the life story with "Chapter Six: The Hellraiser Years (Sydney)" ... sometime very soon.

Comments

Dee said…
Sounds like you were awesomely qualified, IMO!

xx Dee
Mike Riversdale said…
HA HA HA, well obviously I thought so. Would've been a grand adventure - maybe there's still chance, perhaps I should apply ;-)